Prof. Dr. Satya Vrat Shastri's Thai Ramayana 46, Rama meets Sita

Lava and Mankuta took Rama to meet their mother. The boys narrated the entire story. Sita face to face with Rama, transfixed, could neither stay nor go! Looking at Rama, not seen for long, as if drinking him in with her eyes, having fasted long, she did not feel contented, but in a moment had a different feeling.

This was the man who had ordered her killed. He was the reason why she had spent ten years in the forest. Highly suspicious, he had not believed her words.  She wanted nothing to do with him, 'The most cruel one. My life is like a cremation ground. Not even with an iota of joy. Living like a female ascetic!' She was also worried, 'Why has he come? To put my sons into trouble?'  Her mind full of disturbing and confusing thoughts, she was not her normal self.

Rama looked at her again and again, feeling very remorseful, he blamed fate for his mental aberration. He apologised profusely for his rash judgement and begged forgiveness.  He touched the feet of Sita to bring her around. He pleaded with her to go with him to Ayodhya. He said his life was as desolate as hers. Each night felt as long as a Brahma's day and he thought of her all the time.

 Sita still not out of her deep anger, retorted. 'When you ordered my killing did you not realise that your entire life may become desolate? It is my luck that I am alive. But for you, I have already died!' And added,  'You had suspicion about my moral character, while I was guarded by many in the palace of Ravana. I have been alone in the forest for ten long years. How come you have no suspicion about my character that you want to take me along?'

Reminded him how, wanting to be near him, she roamed the forest with him for many years. Even then suspicion arose in his mind. Just looking at the picture of Ravana, his narrow mind went out of control with jealousy and anger.  She declared, 'I have lived ten long years here in the midst of the forest. I want to spend somehow the rest of my life in this forest. I am your wife and I shall think always of your welfare.'

She shed tears continuously and Rama his eyes also full of tears tried again to convince her go with him, but Sita was unmoved. Then Rama asks her to send his sons back with him. She does not know what to do. She would be all alone. They were the only prop she had in her life. She then thought of the advantage her sons would have living in Ayodhya and felt she would cause them harm by her selfishness. Their father would bring them up as princes and decided to send her sons with their father.

'I have endured separation from my husband for ten years. I shall now endure a long separation from my sons. I am Sita, I have to endure everything.' She bade good bye to her sons and kept looking at them till they were out of her sight from her cottage. She then dropped down like the trunk of a  plantain tree.

Raghunath said...

In the present environment of Female activism Rama would have been pilloried! But the times were different. In any case both the versions agree that Sita did not go back to Ayodhya. Serves Rama right!!